Independence

My kids are growing up so fast.  They're are becoming more independent every day.  It's sad to know they're not going to depend on me as much but it helps me so much right now, too.  Kyler's learning to bathe himself (which is wonderful because it's really starting to hurt my back to bend over the bathtub) and both kids have started picking out their own clothes and get dressed in the mornings without being told.  It's really quite lovely.  Now if they would just clean their rooms and put away their clean laundry without being asked.... :) 

I keep having people tell me (or tell me that they heard from someone else) what a strong woman I am.  I don't feel strong.  I've been thinking about this all week and I'm glad that people see me being strong for my kids but I really feel like I could fall apart at any moment.  Tears are close to the surface most of the time.  I'm pretty depressed (which is hard for me, too.  I've never dealt with depression before and I'm not sure how to get past it).  I don't feel strong at all.

I have seen two verses posted on Facebook in the last 12 hours, with regards to the death of Osama bin Laden. I can't say I'm sad that he's dead, just as I know that in 1945 (almost to the day, btw - it was April 30th) I would have felt absolutely no sadness to hear of Hitler's death. However, I am sad that it's another soul that will spend eternity separated from a holy God because Osama chose to spend his life the same way. I do think about the fact that my sin, while smaller on a worldly scale, is the same to God as the sin of Osama. I am saved from the horror of an eternity in hell only by the grace of God. Here are the two verses I've seen posted, the first more often than the second:

"When the righteous prosper, the city rejoices; when the wicked perish, there are shouts of joy." Proverbs 11:10

"Say to them, 'As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways and live." Ezekiel 33:11

Anyone notice that in the Proverbs verse you see the reaction of PEOPLE, not God? God is not joyful over the death of Osama. I believe he grieves over any life that ends with another soul in hell. Even those who are decidedly evil (by our wordly view - by His, we are all evil until we fall on His mercy, are we not?). I believe He grieved when Hitler died just as much as He grieved for all of the people that Hitler murdered. I believe He's grieving that Osama is in hell with Satan today, with no further chance for redemption.